Nine Years

It's odd to think how different life was 9 years ago. Many things change in that amount of time, but I can't help but have 9/11 on the brain today. I think about it often, which I think is normal in my situation.
I was a senior in high school. I had been married 3 months and had my whole life in front of me. We had just moved out of Aaron's parents' house. I was an office aide, and I remember thinking it was an awful accident as I watched the news, the first tower in flames. When the second plane hit, my stomach dropped and I felt this horrible sense of dread. So many people died that day. Innocent people who were minding their own business, running the rat race, providing for their families. I wonder how many of them had fought with their spouses the night before. How many of them didn't kiss their kids goodbye? How many people's lives ground to a halt that day, as they found out their loved ones had been in the building or on the plane that will never be forgotten?
I think of the fear I felt, and I didn't lose anyone in the attack. I can't imagine the feelings of those who did. Aaron had class that ngiht, and I begged him not to go. I was shaken. My faith in humanity took a hard hard hit, and I thought this was the end of the world. I saw all my plans for the future going out the window. They'd bring back the draft. My husband would be sent to war and killed. I'd never have children. (Um, I was 18, and prone to panic.) Anyway, I needed my husband that night.
A lot of people compare it to Pearl Harbor, and it is like Pearl Harbor. The worst attack on US soil, a cowardly act that killed so many people who'd never done anyone wrong. I don't know the numbers, how many people flocked to recruiting offices on December 8, 1941, but I've heard that there were lines out the doors. It took some serious talking to convince my own husband not to sign up to be a gun-totin' infantryman that very day. He was angry, and he wanted to protect his country. I begged him. I cried. I told him I couldn't handle being an infantryman's wife and that I couldn't stay married to him if he joined the Army. I am not proud of that, but it was honest.
I can't believe where life has taken us since then. Even now, I am sometimes taken aback to realize I am married to a soldier! I always said I couldn't marry a military man, and I'm sure I wouldn't have looked twice at Aaron had he been in the Army or planning to sign up when we'd met.

Tonight, tomorrow, and every single day, my heart goes out to those who lost loved ones in the attack. My heart goes to those who lose their loved ones in the war, and to those who sacrifice so much time and so many life experiences with their families to fight for something they believe in, whether it's the war, their way of life, or even just their own families.

I don't know how to end this.